Like many people, I was born in a strange time when Generation X wrapped up, and the Millennial generation got started. I know I’m not alone in my feeling of being stuck between two places. As a result, I sometimes feel like I don’t belong, which has created a strong desire for a sense of belonging to something in my life. Who’s with me? As someone stuck in the crossover between Gen X and Millennials, I’ve learned a little about how to manage this feeling. Here’s what being a Millennial/Gen X crossover has taught me about life.
Generation What Now?
You’ve probably heard the terms Gen X and Millennial thrown about, but what do they mean? For a little clarity, let me explain. Gen X (or Generation X) refers to the group of people born between the mid-1960s and mid-1980s, while Millennials are the generation of people born in the 80s and early 90s.
So now you know what I’m talking about. You may even be able to place yourself in one of these groups or, like me, be one of the many people caught somewhere in the middle—that little no man’s land of generations. So, you may be able to understand this “out of place” sensation I’m talking about.
It extends further than a generation gap or age gap, though. I liken it to being caught somewhere between two worlds—the human and the spiritual. It’s a feeling of displacement, of not quite fitting in, or feeling like something is off. But it’s possible to move past those feelings and find your place in the world, wherever that might be.
Reasons Why You Feel Like You Don’t Belong
This feeling can manifest itself in many ways, and I’ll run through them now.
#1: A Different Worldview
It can be hard to find your place in the world when you’re constantly bombarded on all sides by social media, the news and the thoughts and opinions of your friends, family and work colleagues.
All those views and perspectives can be confusing, and the pressure to make your choices while worrying if they’re the right ones is real. If your views don’t align with the people in your bubble, it can feel very isolating and lonely.
But there are ways to counteract this—by seeking out people with similar views and opinions to you or activities and hobbies that align with your feelings and ideals.
#2: Difficulty Expressing Yourself
The ability to communicate your feelings and desires well goes a long way to helping you find your place in the world. If you struggle to convey those thoughts, it can leave you with a sense of not feeling accepted or welcome by those around you. It’s entirely possible to learn how to work on your communication skills, though, and practising regularly is the best way to do this.
#3: Not Hearing What Others Are Saying
Of course, communication isn’t a one-way street, and it’s not just about how you speak to people. You need to listen, too, and hear what others are saying around you. Listening, specifically with the intent to understand, is something we can all actively choose to do. It’s an empowering act that strengthens and builds relationships in positive ways.
#4: Changing and Growing
Life happens. We’re always moving forward, growing and learning new things. We’re constantly changing and evolving as we move through our lives and experiences, in both positive and negative ways. It might mean people disappear from your life, but it can also suggest new ones come along too.
Embracing this change and growth goes a long way to making the whole experience worthwhile and meaningful.
#5: Feeling Stuck or Stagnating
When things aren’t changing or growing, you feel stuck in place, stagnating and not progressing. This feeling can be hard to shake and can lead to a spiralling down of feelings and emotions if it’s allowed to. Recognizing you’re stuck in a rut is key here so that you can make the changes needed to break out of that stagnating place.
#6: Feeling Culturally Isolated
Living in an area where you feel different to the population living around you can feel very isolating. You might dress differently from everyone else, have different political views, or consider yourself an open-minded person surrounded by close-minded people.
A location change can help if that feels like something you can and are able to do, or simply seek out those who match your views and thoughts if possible.
Of course, communication isn’t a one-way street, and it’s not just about how you speak to people. You need to listen, too, and hear what others are saying around you. Listening, specifically with the intent to understand, is something we can all actively choose to do. It’s an empowering act that strengthens and builds relationships in positive ways.
Ways To Move Past This Feeling
I often feel like I’m walking in two worlds in all aspects of my life. On the one hand, I am moving through the human world, doing human work, trauma healing and nervous system work. And yet, on the other hand, in the spiritual world, I’m working with manifestations and energy. And this holds true for many of you as well.
It is possible to move past the sense of not belonging. You can do this by:
- Journaling
Taking the time to work through your thoughts and feelings through journaling can be a powerful method to come to a sense of understanding. And from understanding, healing can begin.
- Finding your crowd
No one should have to go through these experiences and feelings alone. There will be others like you out there who understand and get it. Find your people and surround yourself with them.
- Embracing who you really are
It can be hard to embrace who you really are when you’re surrounded by people who either don’t accept that or actively try to make you change. But acceptance has to first start with accepting yourself and loving yourself for who you are. Once you have self-acceptance, the approval of others will follow.
- Getting support
And when you really are feeling isolated with no one to turn to, seeking out support in a more professional capacity can be a great way to empower you and get you the guidance you need. Because maybe, just maybe, you were never meant to fit in. Because you’re made to stand out.
If you feel like you might like to speak with me and see how I can help you, I’d love to talk with you. Reach out and book a call. I can’t wait to hear from you.